Spirituality To, & Through, Me

I was once asked while presenting on a creative panel if I had frequent encounters with people who challenged my beliefs…

While out with a friend and the topic of organized religion came up, I was passively told “I’d figure it out” in response to me taking a moment to consider how I wanted to explain to them my perception of Jesus...

While at an event, a woman sat and watched me for hours, only to come to my table after I was done for the day to ask me a series of probing questions, tell me “Jesus is waiting for me to accept him into my life,” then walk to her car and leave the event entirely.

I've had people refer to me as an angel, and others refer to me as a demon, or a witch...

It's typical for someone in my line of work.

As someone who shows up as a spiritual mentor, openly practices psychic mediumship, and calls in "God" before every session - people are often both confused, and curious, about my beliefs - totally understandable.

But I’ve noticed something else in these encounters - layered confusion. Not just about me, but about my responses… after I share my thoughts and experiences, I notice people questioning of themselves. Of their choice to question me, and the sometimes earth shattering reality check that is my answer, because it goes against the preconception of who people think I am, or what Spirituality can look like.

Like when that proselytizing woman asked me who I communicate with in my readings became visibly shocked and confused by my answer being “God”… Or when I was asked how I respond to people challenging my beliefs and I said “I don’t - that’s their path” and was met with silence. Or when I was told “I’d figure out” my personal beliefs when, really - I know exactly what I believe and why, I just wanted to be intentional in conveying them to another party...

It’s an interesting process and experience being openly spiritual. Many people don’t get it, or they think they do based off of what they’ve seen or heard socially so they dismiss you even when they think they’re being curious. And that if someone believes something different than them, it must be wrong, evil, challenged, or put to an end.

With that being said I’ve been fortunate to have been primarily met with genuine curiosity as a professional when it comes to my beliefs, even though for much of my life and for many intuitives this isn’t the case. Most people pick a lane, or are assigned one, and they inexorably stay put, unyielding to any change - even at times fighting against it - for acceptance, and in many cases, survival.

But my truth is that I don’t subscribe to any one faith. And I can’t.

Because I have an insatiable appetite for learning more about myself and the world around me in it's entirety, not just the “safe” facets of it that come with instructions but the parts that require faith, discipline and grit.

And I have a desire to continue being curious and open minded to the experiences of my fellow humans so that I can continue to become a better human myself.

My journey of exploring faith has lead me down many paths; from being raised in an outwardly Christian household where my dad quoted scripture - then contradicted it - to private Christian elementary school, studies of world religions in college, and my own personal awakening and rebirth cycles throughout my life.

I've lost my connection to God and Jesus after years of abuse, then invited them back in of my own volition and informed consent later on - not as a Christian - but as a spiritual being seeking balance within my human experience. And I didn’t stay there, because I don’t believe that’s the only valid spiritual context in this world. Nor do I believe that I’ll ever have all the information or answers. I simply study. And the more I do that, the more I find to believe in and explore - not discount, disregard, or demonize.

Im not a Christian, Buddhist, Taoist, Spiritualist, witch - or any of the other labels that people have tried to assign me to simplify my existence for their own understanding and comfort. I’m just me. And that changes as I experience more life.

Breaking Point: a sculpture symbolizing evolving through struggle, and facing fear head on, as a quest to find the light in our darkness. 📍Lewis Ginter Botanical Garden

So what do I actually believe...? First let's answer the question, what is Spirit (to me).: 

To me the words Spirit and God are interchangeable, and when I say either of them I’m typically referring to the “all that is”. I believe in Divine Consciousness - and I believe we are all an extension of it experiencing itself.

I believe in an energy beyond our full comprehension that makes up everything seen and unseen; a source through which all is created, expressed, expanded, and destroyed - hence the similarities throughout ancient religious and cultural references. A mechanism for discovery, truth, and balance that can be tapped into and utilized as support along our journey toward living out our purpose and expressing our truth - and yes - I still call that "God".

Now, I get into various deeper details of what I mean by that throughout my blog, but to keep it in simpler terms I’ll point to Gnosticism and science, where we have The First Law of Thermodynamics, which tells us that energy cannot be created or destroyed, only transformed or transferred; as well as the The Law of Perpetual Transmutation of Energy from the 12 Universal Laws that link back to the historical Kybalion - which states that energy is constantly changing and transforming from one form to another, allowing us to shift our reality by raising and lowering our vibration.

In short, it’s my belief that Spirit or what many refer to as “God”, is the interconnected source of our reality and consciousness that’s constantly experiencing itself and evolving through and around us in everything. The "I Am," no matter what you point to.

Now what about ancestors...? 

To me, ancestors aren't just the people who have come and gone before us - they’re the forbearers for all that exists today - be that a person, place, thing, or thought. To me an ancestor can be a beloved friend or family member who still supports and guides us from beyond the physical, or our own past self bridging a connection to remind us of our own inner wisdom.

& Spirituality as a whole...? 

To me, spirituality isn’t something you subscribe to or place in a box with a label - it’s something you practice and become through learning and remembering.

It’s awareness. Consciousness. Presence. & Intention.

It’s the willingness to sit with both the light and darkness within yourself, without labeling one as good and the other as bad, but understanding both as necessary for our eternal understanding and evolution.

It’s choosing to respond with honesty, to meet yourself with grace, and to continue evolving through every season of your life knowing you are supported by the source of life itself.

My spirituality isn’t defined by a label. It’s defined by how I show up, how I listen, and how I choose to grow. And as for Jesus I perceive him as an ascended master who incarnated as an extension of God to introduce Divine Consciousness to what was humanity at that time.

I don’t have anything to figure out, just more to become as I evolve through my being, my presence, my curiosity, and my exploration.

That’s it.